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The seven basic feelings are;
Mad
Sad
Glad
Hurt
Afraid
Shame
Hope
Whenever I state these, people always ask me, well, what
about love? I answer that love is
the core of everything. It is
called many things, but feeling connected to others and ourselves is our basic
humanness. The other seven are
ancillary and help us negotiate the basic problems of love.
Love is the most basic need of all. To feel welcomed, valued, honored and
accepted (to name a few) is what every one of us hopes to achieve.
Each feeling has its accompanying need and consequence if
not met.
So I am going to take each feeling and expand on it a bit in
hopes that people can begin to articulate what they are feeling a little
better. That helps a lot in
relationships
It always amuses me that if you ask a man what he feels, he
will tell you what he thinks and obversely, if you ask a woman what she thinks,
she will likely tell you what she thinks.
The integrating of thinking and feelings creates the outcomes we all
desire. Putting who you are back
on what you do.
The next feeling on my list is GLAD. Not as easy as it sounds, at least not for
more then a brief time, then back to the grind. Glad seems to be a transition feeling, and is usually the result
of an achievement or other success.
Most of us chase happiness and joy around like trying to find the pot of
gold at the end of a rainbow, with the same outcome.
Glad needs celebration. If that need is not met the person often becomes
self-effacing,, withdrawn and may lead to pettiness. If glad is celebrated, that becomes joy, love and a sense of
fulfillment.
There are so many contradictory messages about glad that it
is hard to know how to celebrate at all.
From BE HAPPY, DON’T WORRY, to
“Don’t be a braggart, don’t toot your own horn”, and all in between. Happiness remains elusive and a moving
target.
A lot of people seem to view being happy, as a permanent
state, is achievable. That is only
possible if a person is in what they do and living in the present.
