Wednesday, September 4, 2019

Levels of Listening




I hope people find this interesting and useful




Levels of Listening
1. Hearing the words
2. Hearing the words and partial feelings
3. Hearing the words, accepting feelings
4. Hearing the words, accepting feelings, making plans to deal with issues


                  Levels of speaking
                        1. Saying the words
                        2. Saying the words and partial disclosure
                        3. Saying the words acknowledging meaning
                        4. Saying the words, acknowledging meaning. Checking out impact


Levels of Impact
1. Reporting information
2. Reporting information, partial challenge
3. Reporting information, full challenge, engagement
4. Reporting information full challenge, engagement. Transformation


                  Levels of Learning
                        It is not the same as study, finding out what others know, knowing                                                         answers or measured by exams.  It is the process of solving our own problems for our                          own purposes by questioning, thinking, feeling and testing until the solution is part of                          our lives.
                        1. New skills and information
                        2. New thoughts and beliefs
                        3. New identity and behaviors
                        4. New intuitions and creativity


Wednesday, July 17, 2019

Reaction To Emotional Risks




If you take an emotional risk there are three phases you can expect to experience within hours, or days following that risk.

The first reaction is an implosion, meaning self-criticism, the opposite of an explosion.  However, you take yourself down is the first, often painful reaction to an emotional risk.

The second phase is a pervasive sense that something is wrong, or you have done something wrong.  People report looking around to figure out “what’s wrong”.

The final, and often most difficult phase is a sense of impending doom, you are convinced that something dreadful is about to happen.

As nothing dreadful happens the feeling will dissipate, but not before the process is complete.  Then you can take another risk, but not before.  What we call the child in you has to see that he has lived to tell the tale.

If you put a child’s thinking and words to the sequence, it would sound something like,
“oops”
“uh-oh”
“Now I’m really gonna get it”.

Many people have trouble enduring these phases because the feelings are so intense and disturbing that it is difficult to keep going.  That is because the person is experiencing what it was like as a child when they took that risk.

Arleah Shechtman