Thursday, February 9, 2017

The Seven Basic Feelings GLAD



The seven basic feelings are;
Mad
Sad
Glad
Hurt
Afraid
Shame
Hope

Whenever I state these, people always ask me, well, what about love?  I answer that love is the core of everything.  It is called many things, but feeling connected to others and ourselves is our basic humanness.  The other seven are ancillary and help us negotiate the basic problems of love. 

Love is the most basic need of all.  To feel welcomed, valued, honored and accepted (to name a few) is what every one of us hopes to achieve.

Each feeling has its accompanying need and consequence if not met.

So I am going to take each feeling and expand on it a bit in hopes that people can begin to articulate what they are feeling a little better.  That helps a lot in relationships

It always amuses me that if you ask a man what he feels, he will tell you what he thinks and obversely, if you ask a woman what she thinks, she will likely tell you what she thinks.  The integrating of thinking and feelings creates the outcomes we all desire.  Putting who you are back on what you do.

The next feeling on my list is GLAD.  Not as easy as it sounds, at least not for more then a brief time, then back to the grind.  Glad seems to be a transition feeling, and is usually the result of an achievement or other success.  Most of us chase happiness and joy around like trying to find the pot of gold at the end of a rainbow, with the same outcome.   

Glad needs celebration.   If that need is not met the person often becomes self-effacing,, withdrawn and may lead to pettiness.  If glad is celebrated, that becomes joy, love and a sense of fulfillment. 

There are so many contradictory messages about glad that it is hard to know how to celebrate at all.  From BE HAPPY, DON’T WORRY, to  “Don’t be a braggart, don’t toot your own horn”, and all in between.  Happiness remains elusive and a moving target.  

A lot of people seem to view being happy, as a permanent state, is achievable.  That is only possible if a person is in what they do and living in the present.